How to be a good dad in today’s world?

God delights in fathers, because He himself is a Father and has a Father’s heart. Jesus Christ came to the earth as a Son to reveal to us the Father, and to show the relationship with the Father in Heaven. Let’s look at the issue of fatherhood from God’s perspective. God wants to make this an integral part of every earthly father’s life. So that in all of the seven areas of life we will be functioning as God expects us to.

How does God perceive the position of being head of a family? What does it mean to be a good dad? If we can only grasp with faith the concept of fatherhood created by God Himself. And if we begin to live in such a way, we will experience God releasing something in a spiritual reality and in the physical realm. It does not have to remain a distant, unattainable idea.

The Concept of the Fatherhood

The prayer of the Apostle Paul written in Ephesians opens with the words: For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name (Eph. 3:14-15, NIV). Any concept of fatherhood has its origin in God. To understand God’s concept of fatherhood we must first understand what is the meaning of the “head” from the biblical point of view. The head should not be a burden that is carried by the neck. The biblical concept of the head means: source, supply, protection, wisdom, priesthood blessing. Fatherhood can be considered within seven key aspects.

1. Fatherhood AS PROTECTION

The father is to be primarily the protector of other family members. Jesus often said that God the Father was with him. The Father did not leave him alone. While on earth Christ always did what pleased the Father. And that means that he had to know God’s will and what pleases Him. If the Lord Jesus felt safe, moving within the boundaries set by the Father, that is to say, he knew exactly what boundaries had the Father set for him to move within. Christ spoke all the time with the authority.

He said: I say only what I’ve heard from the Father, and that’s what I’m telling you. For what purpose? To give us only that which comes directly from the Father.The head stands for protection and safety. Head of the family is to determine the boundaries. In the beginning they cannot be understood by a small child. For example: children do not grasp why they shouldn’t play with electrical devices or a heater. Although with time they realize that their father (maybe not always very skillfully, but with love) sets certain limits only for their good. The boundaries must be clearly determined and be age appropriate.

Through us – fathers, God wants to bring to the family an atmosphere of safety. Also of clear communication of boundaries, which are respected in our home. A father explains the boundaries saying: “we have such and such rules… We come home at certain hours, we keep up to these rules or these are the values that are important in our family.” It is us, the fathers, in the first place, that are called to take care of that area in our homes. So that an atmosphere of safety can always be present. It is expressed in the following words: “Dad is at home, so we have nothing to fear.”

2. Fatherhood IS PROVISION

The biblical concept of “head” can be translated also as “a source”. This can be understood as a water source but also as the means of satisfying needs. He who provides meets the needs. It refers as well to wisdom, advice, friendship, discernment of the situation, motivation, and all good things. Clearly defined need helps to more effectively seek its fulfillment. Fathers who really are the source, think about providing for their close ones.

They do not think selfishly of themselves, or of their own self-realization goals. Sometimes they unconsciously seek to ensure they follow the example of Jesus Christ, and think of the needs of their family before their own needs. Firstly they want to provide for their wife, then the children. The role of the father is to promote others and not themselves.

3. Fatherhood IS ENCOURAGEMENT

A good father knows how to notice, encourage and strengthen every manifestation of goodness in the other person. He celebrates successes of his loved ones, appreciates their every effort and expresses his approval towards them God says of his Son: You are my beloved son. In you I am well pleased! It was spoken by God the Father in public! I have no doubt that Jesus was hearing those words from his Father all the time, whenever he was meeting with his Father in his daily intimate moments. Fatherhood is encouraging, empowering all what is good. Fatherhood is designed to utter the words, “My son/my daughter …I’m really proud of you.”

In Proverbs we find two verses, which I call a two way response. They words: a wife of noble character is her husband’s crown (Prov. 12:4a, NIV) and: Grandchildren are the crown of old men, and the glory of sons is their fathers (Prov. 17:6, NASV). A fascinating wisdom shines from this passage. If a husband and a father is a protector, supplier and encouragement to his wife, then – according to God’s Word – the wife is of noble character and becomes a crowned glory of who the man actually is. The crown on the head of her husband testifies about who he is. As a result, the next generation, namely children, know how to prepare a generation coming after them, that is namely the grandchildren. Looking from the perspective of our children – can we say that as fathers, we are their pride? Have we done everything as we should have done? If there are doubts, maybe the two qualities listed below will turn to be a helpful tool to rebuild and unleash the potential of even greater blessings.

4. Fatherhood IS AUTHORITY

The biblical concept of the head also includes the concept of authority. This is a kind of copyrighted concept of God, who has the supreme authority as the Father. His Son, Jesus Christ, respected, esteemed and recognized Him. By all that he did, he proved that he deserves to be given authority himself. Christ always insisted, saying: “The authority has been given to me by my Father.” Authority exercised in love, expressed through protecting care over others, providing and encouraging, gives also the right to discipline, correct and to set clear boundaries. It is shaping the next generation in authority.

People who, through honoring the authority figures, placed in their lives by God, prove that they deserve to be given authority themselves. In God’s law respecting the authority starts at home and is shaped by the attitude of a father. God marked the role of a father with great importance.The authority’s sphere of influence of a father (of a family) is determined by his personal life of intimacy with God. This intimate relationship with God gives a father the power to speak words that change the reality. This life which is lived in a close friendship with God, gives him as well the authority to resist the devil. Only when we draw near to God, can we say to the enemy of God, when he’s knocking on our door, “Go away! This is not your territory.You have no rights to this household.” This kind of authority we, as fathers, acquire only in an intimate relationship with God. From my own experience, I know that without the help of our wives, we are not able to cope by ourselves. They can support us in this role as fathers.

God has appointed them to be our greatest help. But it is us, the fathers, whom God has called to take position in every case and situation. The closeness with God is not an obligation. Jesus, referring to intimacy with God, says: No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you (John 15:15, NASB). Jesus says that when he knocks, and you open to Him, He will be communing with you. The word ‘to commune’ means the kind of close relationships, which are offered only to a friend. Jesus not only meets with you, but you will enjoy dining together, fellowship with each other and delight in each other presence. The proximity does not come from a sense of duty, but out of a sense of yearning, sincerity and mutual devotion to each other.

5. Fatherhood AS PRIESTHOOD

God has established that, before the whole congregation came to the tent of the Covenant, the Sabbath was to be begin at home. On Friday, after sunset. A father of a family was to be a priest, who would open the Word of God and would fully shre from it. A father had to provoke children to ask questions, so that he could explain the faith. It was the quality of his life that was to affirm the faith in the next generation. God reminded that whatever we do as fathers – whether we eat a meal, or set out on a journey – our life is to emanate the message: My God, whom I love with all of my strength, all of my mind, and with all of my heart. Authority of the father as a priest in the family comes as well from a close relationship with God. And it’s not only the authority within the household. It is also about the authority over the enemy of God. This authority we’ll acquire only through sincerely committing ourselves to God.

What is the function of a father as a priest? When a father is standing before God, he is representing his home. But when he is standing in front of the members of his household, he represents God who anoints him to do so. God gives him the privilege of prayer. And together with his wife they are given even a greater privilege: the power of prayer agreed. God says that if the two agree on a certain issue and bring it in prayer before God’s throne, they will receive it.The Holy Spirit sustains us when we cry to God: “Abba, Father, Daddy.” When such a relationship with the Father in Heaven will be formed in us, the dimension of the priesthood, to which God has called every man and father, with the help of our wives will be realized. So I encourage us to build an intimate relationship with God, not only to strengthen the authority of our priesthood, but also to enter into the realm of the prophetic. We are to be releasing in each other the destiny, calling and anointing that God has for each of his children. First in our households, and next in whole communities.

6. Fatherhood IS A PROPHETIC RELEASING OF THE POTENTIAL

Many young people leave the house without having a specific purpose in life. The purpose of a father is to release in the prophetic, full potential of the next generation. God has called us, fathers, not only to plan for the security and provision, but also we are to prophesy over our children. Prophecy is not the utterance of wishful thinking. Prophesy simply means to see the potential that God has placed in a person. Prophesy that is rooted in the example of Jesus Christ, who, when he begins something, he also brings it to the end. Christ wants to bring this potential to thrive. A good father sees the potential in their child and says, “I see what you’re capable of. I see your potential and I unleash the power of God unto you, for this potential to be fully developed. In prayer, I ask that God who lives in you will bring it to completion.” These prophecies, and the releasing of God’s plans over someones life, are stored in Heaven for every family member.

God called fathers to free in a prophetic manner His purposes, and to recognize the potential in those we father. Without these prophetic words, without this prophetic proclamation the potential will not be released.When a father places his hands on the head of his children and blesses them, when he prophesies over their lives, over their destiny – he proclaims over them God’s call and God’s destiny. In this way he works with the Spirit of Christ – the Spirit of Sonship. He is passing on what has been inspired by the Father in Heaven and given by the Holy Spirit. When a husband, a father perceives it, he starts to walk by faith, not merely by sight (2 Cor 5:7). He does not focus on what he can see at the very moment, but he sees what the person can become in God. He does not expect this wishfully, but with courage he proclaims that direction or plan which God has set, and He himself will bring it to completion. These words of faith initiate a spiritual process.

7. Fatherhood as A LEGACY AND AN AREA OF BLESSING

Fathers are appointed by God to establish the area of blessings in their households. God has obligated us to speak and proclaim his name over our wives and children. He gave us His name to call on Him and do things on His behalf. God said: In this way they are to put my name on the people of Isra’el, so that I will bless them. (Numbers 6:27, CJB). God says: I want to bless them, but I need you, fathers, to need to, so stand the authority of my name and declare these words upon your loved ones. Then I’ll be able to bless them – God says. This is what “Aaron’s blessing” is about. It sounds like this: The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace. (Numbers 6:24-26, NIV). May God give you His peace, well-being, may He truly bless you.

God says to us today: “Fathers, arise! Arise as a protection, as a source, as providers, as an encouragement, as those who uplift others. Cultivate intimacy with me, and step into the position of authority and priesthood in your homes! Then we, as fathers, who walk in the prophetic anointing will not only recognize, but will empower, release and trace God’s way and direction for their children, so that even in their old age they will walk in it. We will leave behind a glorious legacy: A generation after God’s own heart.